Why do Mom’s feel guilty about so many different things? I feel guilty I quit my job to be a stay at home mom; I feel guilty I work 50 hours a week. I feel guilty I don’t bring in enough money, yet seem to spend so much of it. I feel guilty I’m so tired after work that I just want to eat and sleep. I feel guilty I want a night out with my friends. I feel guilty I’m missing story time again because I’m out with friends. I feel badly because my kid was the only one not wearing the right color at the school musical. I feel badly that I missed another school musical.
Seems like no matter who you are as a parent, you feel guilty. The thing is, we put these feelings on ourselves. We have created it in our heads. Truth is, we shouldn’t feel guilty when we’re doing the right thing for ourselves and our families. If we would just notice the moment and the exact thing that is making us feel guilt and then acknowledge it and make a call: is it the right thing to do or is it the wrong thing to do. Then once the call is made and our behavior or decision set, let go of the guilt. Take two minutes and turn it around, like this
- In what way is “the thing I feel guilty about” also in anyway possible a blessing?
- Mental note: the blessing is _________. Thank you, Lord for the blessing of_________.
- Final Step: Let Him hold your guilt and focus on the blessing.
For instance, I feel guilty I quit my job to be a stay at home mom. Thank you for trusting me to be the mother of this child. Thank you that my husband has a stable, secure income and can provide for me to be the primary role in my children’s lives.
Another example: I feel guilty I work 50 hours a week. Thank you for the work. Thank you that I love my work so much that 50 hours of my time is spent doing things I truly enjoy doing. Thank you that my family has food on their table, red wine in our belly, and a warm roof over their heads.
I cannot quote any single piece of scientific evidence that my method will work for you to resolve your guilt. But I am a truth teller and this is my truth. I pray in times of negative and positive emotion and in each, I am better for it.