Tag: mom blog

Fruit of the Spirit Challege: Kindness

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We are half way through the MaverickRx Fruit of the Spirit Challenge.  We’re curious if these weekly emails have given you food for thought? We are hopeful that they’ve been a bright spot in your week and we hope you’ll remember to join us Thursday at 8:30 for our Facebook discussion of this week’s topic.  

In case you missed it, last week we talked about patience.  We explored how difficult it is to be patient while living in a “now culture” and while facing challenging times (hello 2020 🤪).

Let’s get to it!  This week we’re talking about KINDNESS!  

SCRIPTURE:

Proverbs 11:17 Your kindness will reward you, but your cruelty will destroy you.
Luke 6:31 Do to others as you would like them to do to you.


REFLECTION:

It used to be that if you didn’t have anything nice to say, you said nothing at all, or so we were told.  In 2020 it feels like no one has anything nice to say and they say it all the time.  People have become embolden, almost brazen, in their meanness.  

To be honest, the lack of kindness toward other human beings was a motivating factor in the creation of the Fruit of the Spirit Challenge.  A massive shift occured this year – we went from living in our little bubbles to staring day in and day out at disease numbers, political unrest, racial tension, and inequities in healthcare and education.  Our news outlets and social media feeds are peppered with division across a broad range of critically important current events.

Everyone feels like they must take a stand, have a position, voice their opinion, speak up, be heard! At some point though, we’re all just filling the space with noise.  We aren’t listening, caring, or helping one another as we should.  We aren’t digging into our hearts for compassion; we’re laying into people with our words of division.  By participating in the negative noise, we are perpetuating it.  

Here is a perfect example.  Today I was looking at something on Facebook.  There was a negative comment on the post that I disagreed with – not the content of the words, just the fact that the person felt the need to type the negativity.  I almost clicked the angry face and asked the person a question. 

I refrained.  I chose to pray for my own patience and kindness and I kept scrolling.  Listen, it isn’t going to stop.  It isn’t going away.  People are angrier than they have ever been and sure, they have every right to be, people have every right to have their own opinion and share it.  But what gives us all the right to treat each other badly because of the difference of opinion?  What gives us the right to be out right mean?  Why do we feel compelled to explain our side, give them a piece of our mind?  SPOILER ALERT: we aren’t all supposed to be the same.  Our differences keep us open, learning, and growing.  Our differences ask us to look at the world through a different lense, explore our own beliefs, and narrow in on who we are as individuals.

The only way to get closer to kindness is to CHOOSE KINDESS amidst difference.  

Sometimes I am lucky enough to go on a date with my dad (p.s. Dad it’s been too long!) We talk for hours and I love it. I always take away more than he does because he is wise and has read more books than anyone I’ve ever met.  On one such date he shared a Stephen R. Covey quote:
 

“𝑀𝑜𝓈𝓉 𝓅𝑒𝑜𝓅𝓁𝑒 𝒹𝑜 𝓃𝑜𝓉 𝓁𝒾𝓈𝓉𝑒𝓃 𝓌𝒾𝓉𝒽 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒾𝓃𝓉𝑒𝓃𝓉 𝓉𝑜 𝓊𝓃𝒹𝑒𝓇𝓈𝓉𝒶𝓃𝒹;
𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓎 𝓁𝒾𝓈𝓉𝑒𝓃 𝓌𝒾𝓉𝒽 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒾𝓃𝓉𝑒𝓃𝓉 𝓉𝑜 𝓇𝑒𝓅𝓁𝓎.”
 

Keep this quote front of mind as you engage in conversations. Listening is essential to kindness. Choosing kindness in 2020 looks very much like:

  • Listening without personal motive
  • Caring for each other instead of tearing each other down
  • Being open, honest, and thoughtful
  • Respecting and accepting other people just as they are
  • Electing not to engage with negativity

The absolute beauty of it all is that what you put out into the world is what comes back to you. Keep pushing forward with kindness, keep on the path Luke recommends and kindness will surely come back to you.  


ACTION CHALLENGE:
This week I’ve removed the “social media challenge” and rather ask you to take action by walking through your week choosing kindness – hold doors, smile, LISTEN, and learn from the people in your world. Set an example of kindness and reap the rewards that only love can provide.

Fruit of the Spirit: Patience

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Welcome to week 4 of the MaverickRx Fruit of the Spirit Challenge! Two weeks back we talked about peace and how hard it is to remain at peace during times of struggle.

Remember to join us on Thursday at 8:15 a.m. on Facebook to share your thoughts and find a little inspiration, too.

Let’s get to it!  This week we’re talking about PATIENCE!  

SCRIPTURE:

Romans 12:12

“Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.”


REFLECTION:

We live in a now culture.  One in which everyone wants immediate action, immediate solutions, immediate plans. We email and text people expecting an immediate response. We expect everything to happen exactly as we want. We want traffic to move out of our way, everyone to stay in their own lane, mind their own business, don’t create any problems. We expect smooth sailing, instant, easy breezy lives.  

The fact is, life is hard and challenging. Yet, it is our choice to sit in that hard place with a negative mindset, grumbling about circumstances.  It is our choice to lose our temper in a fit of road rage, over the fridge going out, the internet moving slow, or the children not behaving. Scripture teaches us that the tribulations we see in life present us with teachable moments in the art of patience – God’s endurance training, so to speak.

We all have struggles, big or small. The fact is, we don’t know other people’s struggles. We are called to show up for friends and strangers alike with patience and empathy.  Rather than grumbling over negative circumstances, ask for patience and dial into gratitude.

In Romans, Paul asks us to be “patient in tribulation”. To take action with patience is to wait in prayer.  Talk to God, dump the entirety of your troubles on Him. Lean in while showing compassion for other humans around you – the kids, the spouse, the boss, even the driver in the car next to you. Be gentle with each other as you would like God to be gentle with you.    

SOCIAL MEDIA CHALLENGE:

Tag @MaverickRx in a post inspired by patience on Facebook this week; share something with us that reminds you how much easier life is when we trust God.

Fruit of the Spirit Challenge: Peace

Posted on by Maverick in Blog

This evening we’re stepping into our third week with the MaverickRx Fruit of the Spirit Challenge. We’re hopeful that you’ve been able to take a pause with each email so far and think about how the fruits can positively impact your mindset. Last week we talked about joy and how it nurtures our relationship with God.  

Remember to join us on Thursday at 8:15 a.m. on Facebook to share your thoughts and get a little inspired, too.

Let’s get to it!  This week we’re talking about PEACE!  

SCRIPTURE:

Luke 1: 78-79 New Living Translation (NLT)
Because of God’s tender mercy, the morning light from heaven is about to break upon us, to give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death, and to guide us to the path of peace.”


REFLECTION:

We experience times in life when we feel like God really came through for us, don’t we?  A prayer was answered, a child healed, a marriage renewed, a sunset enjoyed. Those times we fall comfortably into God’s peace and feel at ease.

Then there are the hard times when we feel as though we are very alone, lacking direction, hearing no answers, or not in control.  In those times, when we feel hopeless we have to choose to lean into God as much as possible – to seek his peace, deliberately reminding ourselves of the good work he has done and will most certainly do again.

A few weeks ago Rhonda came to my Pilates class and we were talking about the upcoming weekend. Her mind was in a whirlwind – because she had a lot on her plate in a single day: softball games, relatives visiting, packing grandparents for a move.  We talked about how it will all “work out as it should” and I encouraged her to just take one step at a time.  (Something she’s told me a gazillion times!)  Saturday came around and the games were rained out, the visiting relatives changed their plans, and all she ended up needing to work on was moving her grandparents.  

In the moments when we feel overwhelmed, Rhonda and I often remind each other of the times when things just “work out as they should”.  It rarely goes as we expect it to go, but it always goes as it should.  In hindsight it is plain to see. But in the moment, it requires deliberate choice to be at peace with not being in control.  

Mom Topic Monday: WIN

Posted on by Maverick in YouTube

Do you ever have a day when you just feel totally overwhelmed; like you can’t come up for air? Today was one of those days for me.

Yesterday in the late afternoon my daughter started having what seemed like an allergic reaction to something. Her mouth, feet, knees and fingers began swelling. Her mouth became so swollen the inside of her lip was on the outside of her mouth. I didn’t panic (exactly) but I did call my mom. I was thinking benadryl, and she suggested hydrogen peroxide because it seemed centralized in her mouth and we thought maybe if there was an allergen we could clean in out. Then I watched my daughter like a hawk all night long. The swelling went down, but not away. This morning, she was still quite puffy.

She has a complicated medical history. When she was four she was diagnosed with systemic onset juvenile idiopathic arthritis. At the time, we believed a case of strep throat triggered it. Then after a couple of years of treatment, and only one real flare up, it was gone and she went into remission. When something unusal happens to her, especially if there is any swelling involved, I have to admit I get a little worried. Ok, anxious, I get very anxious. But the reason is very simple, with systemic onset JIA it exists in the body, dormant until something in the body turns it on. It could be strep, it could be a fever, it could be a fall – anything could really turn it on. I have prayed, forever, that nothing would ever turn it back on.

So that was rolling around my head as I dropped the kids at school and headed to work. I went to work, got about half of the day in, and then the nurse called. Grace was miserable. She’d been texting me a bit throughout the morning so I knew she wasn’t feeling well. I called the pediatrician, took my lunch break and we went to the doctor.

My problem today has been a lack of FOCUS. I have tasks I need to accomplish: work, laundry, groceries, pediatrician, workout, dinner. The same tasks I need to accomplish all the time, but when I have a heavy heart, my focus goes out the window. It feels like I can’t move forward because I don’t know what to do next. Have you ever found yourself stretched too thin?

This brings me to tonight’s episode on MaverickRx titled, “Mom Topic Monday: What’s Important Now.” I recently read an incredible book to help me be more intentional. Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less by Greg McKeown is a book that helps us discern between the “trivial many and the vital few”. According to McKeown, essentialism is the art of doing less, but better.

The art of essentialism truly hit home for me. I am a dreamer, I think big, I go all in. I like action and I don’t sit well on the sidelines; I prefer to be on the field. But while this trait can be totally awesome, it can also create an incredibly long to-do list. Which leads to anxiety. Which leads to underperforming. Which leads to increased anxiety. The book essentialism taught be a few truly actionable skills to apply to my entire life. My biggest take away was from Chapter 19: Focus, What’s Important Now (WIN).

The chapter opens with a brief description of an undefeated high school rugby coach who attributes his succes to WIN. Not the act of winning, the acronym – What’s Important Now (WIN). He teaches his players to apply the acronym to every aspect of the game on and off the field. Rather than focusing on the play that just went poorly, the team focuses on “what’s important now” – to move the ball down the field. Rather than focusing on how the other team is playing, they focus on “what’s important now” in their own play. McKeown goes on to share a hectic night of his own during a conference away from home. He got back to his room at the end of a very long day and his mind was spinning. The following day would be full. He remembered the coach, and he thought “what’s important now.” He realized that by asking that one question he could turn off the noise of the trivial many, and focus on the vital few. He took the steps he needed to settle down and get to bed: he called his wife and kids, he prepared his clothes for the next morning, called for a wake up call and ordered his breakfast to arrive in the morning. He was intentional and so he could perform better.

This concept applies to every single one of us – ESPECIALLY PARENTS. What’s Important Now has been a game changer in my life. Today, for instance, when I was bolting to the school to pick up my daughter, she was my WIN. While I spoke to the doctor, he was my WIN. When we left his office, the pharmacy was my WIN. Getting her home and giving her medicine and making sure she was comfortable was important. Then I was able to work. When I sat down at my computer, and looked at my lists, I applied WIN to determine which item to do first. When that was done, I did it again. I repeat this cycle all.day.long.

The hardest part thing to grasp about WIN is that something DOES NOT GET DONE. Today, for me, it was the phone and exercise. I couldn’t take calls, engage in texts, or stay up to the minute on notifications. I couldn’t make it to the gym to take my very favorite fitness class because, sadly, today it was one of the trivial few. Some days WIN expects that of me. I have to let things that are important to me go so that I can focus on NOW. The fact is NOW is all there is.

I hit the ground running with WIN. First fiber, second coffee, third meditation and prayer, fourth social checks, and fifth the kids. Being intentional with how I use my time has allowed me to be more present in each of the places I need to show up. Getting the day started for my kids, creating a video at work, designing a social media giveaway – when I am focused on the vital few I am more productive, focused and less stressed.

It is NOT EASY TO DO. There are times, like today, when I have to lean in and pray hard to God for help focusing and letting go of worry. I ask for strength to get through each step of the day. Some days that are so very hard. We expect a crazy amount from ourselves and often need to cut ourselves some slack. The trouble is, the list does need to get done. The book helped me cope with my anxiety by giving me some tools to discern between what’s important and what can wait.

Subscribe to MaverickRx on YouTube for more Mom Topic Mondays that will help you live your life out loud on your own terms.

Much Love to You,

MAV

Mom Topic Monday: Inadequacy

Posted on by Maverick in YouTube

Have you ever read a steamy romance novel by Nora Roberts?  I have not.  But I have read a trending tweet that quoted the best-selling novelist as saying: “The key to juggling is to know that some of the balls you have in the air are made of plastic and some are made of glass.  If you drop a plastic ball, it bounces, no harm done.  If you drop a glass ball, it shatters, so you have to know which balls are glass and which are plastic and prioitize catching the glass ones.”

In the constant struggle to find work/life balance Robert’s advice gives us a powerful analogy that asks us to set realistic expectations of ourselves.  The idea that we should be doing it all, all of the time in order to feel like “good moms” rubs me the wrong way. We are human and we shouldn’t expect perfection in every area and moment of our lives. There are days when everthing rolls so well – super smooth, no hiccups. Then there are days when it feels like roadblock after roadblock.

If you’ve ever felt inadequate, as if you’re dropping the glass balls in your life, tonight’s episode is a MUST WATCH.  We have certainly felt the pang of inadequacy, in fact, it’s our Mom Topic Monday tonight!     

We also share an important scripture that gives us strength when we are struggling. Grab the printable coloring page for tonight’s scripture; and, please share the mission of MaverickRx with your #momfriends by forwarding this email to a mom who could use some encouragement tonight!  

The 90/10 rule

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“I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you…we are in charge of our attitudes.”
― Charles Swindoll

Yesterday I was driving home, listening to the audible verison of the book Everything is Figureoutable by Marie Forleo and she referenced this quote. I hit the clip and made a note. I do this from time to time when I come across a bit of a book that I am reading that I want to share with you.

I got home and my furnace was out and I quickly employed the 90/10 rule. We did our best all night to keep the house warm, kiddos covered in blankets, and everyone made it comfortably sleeping the night away. When I got in bed the 90/10 idea struck me again as I reflected on a homeless couple I had seen on Sunday in the city. They were bundled up together in a doorway on Washington and Clark. Two bodies snuggled under a heavy mountain of blankets.

I prayed: Thank you, Lord. I am grateful for the roof over my head.

I woke up this morning and started getting ready for work and the kiddos moving for school. I warmed up my shower and ran into the kids bathroom to grab a roll of toilet paper. When I walked in Clay said, “Mom watch this!” He exhaled so that I could see his breath. It struck me b/c that bathroom has some pipe issues; it registered and I thought oh no! I tried to turn on the bathtub. Nada. Frozen.

I grabbed a hairdryer and started to heat up the pipes. The kids ran around and dripped all of the faucets and I called The Hubs. While we were on the phone creating a plan, the pipe burst spraying me in the face and water everywhere. If you’ve ever seen a pipe burst, it really is quite comical. It sprays forcefully – all over the place with no set direction – just randomly hitting here and there, high and low, left and right. Like a lose hose on full blast, attacking you with water. I ran to the basement and turned the water off while the kids hurried around to grab towels and clean up the sopping mess. I swore A LOT and REAL LOUD because when something goes terribly wrong that is what I do. The louder the better. It is cathartic.

Then once the chaose settled, the 90/10 rule struck me again. I tell you this because maybe you’re having a shitty day. Maybe it has been a shitty week or month or year. And maybe you don’t want to employ the 90/10 rule; but, I think believe there is real value in it. Shitty times pass, and they pass faster with the right attitude. A positive attitude can make even the worst of times feel less heavy. I pray a lot (read: all day long) and try as hard as I can to stay in communication with God because he helps me to carry the load of mom worry while staying focused on our big dreams, too. And the 90/10 rule aligns with the teachings I’ve read in the Bible.

Mind you, I can appreciate feeling down. I can embrace it even. When I feel bad, I let it happen. I’m not over here smiling through shit all day, every day. When my daughter is sad, the first thing I suggest is to GET IT OUT. Cry and write it all down, scream it all out loud. But put emotions to it, put words to it and then give it over to God to carry while you address the mascara running down your face. Maybe those days are many and maybe those days are few, but either way, let them be what they are. Because it is ok to feel bad.

I just don’t recommend sitting in it for long.

I believe the 90/10 rule is true and I’m exited to read Swindoll’s book, The Grace Awakening after I finish Marie’s book, Everything is Figureoutable, which I totally recommend.

How Many Hats do Moms Wear?

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Do you ever feel like you wear a million hats? We certainly do. From driver to maid to chef, moms (and dads, too!) wear a lot of hats. We often feel overwhelmed by all the jobs we have. While we are beyond grateful to be moms, sometimes it is just heavy work.

Every day we turn to our faith for strength and to stay centered; when we feel overwhelmed by the worry, the to-do list, or the laundry our faith plays a major role. Truly, I never knew worry the way I now know worry. The worry of motherhood is consuming and truly, there is no end in sight. I remember when I first had my daughter I mentioned not sleeping to my mom. She was honest and said, “yeah…. that’s gone until she leaves the house for good…not college, that’s even worse, but for good – when she’s on her own.” I was like “Wait…what?” Truly though, the weight of motherhood isn’t one that anyone shares before a person becomes a mom.

I often feel like we do a disservice to our comrades by not communicating the truth of parenting. We glorify parenthood, because it is glorious, but in so doing we fail to prepare future parents for the reality of job. Parenthood is 24/7/365 – unlike any other role. You are never off the clock, you are never without the hat of being a mother. You might be off enjoying your first girls weekend away after having a baby thinking, “Yes! I can chill!” And then you get a call that your eight month old daughter has croup and will likely need to be hospitalized. So you and your supportive friends quickly pack up the car and bust ass back home so you can be there for your kid. Because, while chilling with girlfriends is essential and so great – in your heart, as a mother, there is no better place to be than at home taking care of the kids that you created.

When all that weight and reality of our emotions connected with the jobs and hats of motherhood feels like too much – lean in. Lean into God, lean in to your husband, lean into family and friends, and lean into the role. Pray and ask for strength, and it will be given. Pray and ask for help, and it will be given. But never assume that anyone just knows you need help – even your husband or own mother – you must reach out. Don’t let yourself drown in the weight of the work and worry. If you’re wearing the driver hat too often and need a break – speak up. If you’re overwhelmed by the dishes, the yard, the cleaning, the cooking – you have to speak up for yourself and ask for help.

Leaning into God when motherhood feels heavy is legitimately the only way I ever get through any of it. He has big enough shoulders for all of your worries and strength to spare when you need it. Take a breath, step outside, and raise yourself up and ask Him for help.

You got this, mama. You. Got. This.

To hear a few verses that lift us when we struggle with the weight of parenting, watch our latest episode on YouTube! We share the ten hats we’re rotating through the most and the scripture that helps us power up for the day!

Much Love To You.

MAV